Let it go….let it go!

I’m singing that tune tonight because I’m trying to make myself obey it.

Are you trying to tell yourself, “Let it go” to something trivial in your life? There has GOT to be something you are getting all anxious or annoyed about…that doesn’t really matter. In the grand scheme of life…it doesn’t matter. Deep down you know this.

You see – my son just handed me his grade from a project we both worked on. (I have written this sentence 5 times to avoid ending in a proposition and they all sound wrong. I apologize to anyone who is offended by this faux pas. I am asking you to “let it go.”) 🙂

About a month ago, while my son was home sick from school, we were given the details of an assignment that was coming up. It was creating an animal of your choosing out of cardboard, painting it, decorating it, etc. At the time, we completely blew it off, because we had three+ weeks of sickness in our house.

Five days before it was due, I was surfing through emails and panicked when I saw the reminder about the project. Thanks be to God, my mom was staying with us for a few days which allowed us more time to work on it.

Because this was labeled a “family project” I really dove in.  I basically led the project with a controlling agenda and let my son help. Hey, if my name is going to be on this, it has to be impressive. Sadly, these were real thoughts going through my head. Towards the end, I really thought it was good. It wasn’t museum quality, but I raised my eyebrows a few times, impressed with what I, I mean we’d, done with only three days of actually working on it.

And then, I saw a few photos on Facebook of the other kids’ (family) projects. I was stunned. I’m serious – these could be featured in a museum! My jaw dropped and instantly I felt like our tiger project stunk. I started seeing flaws that I hadn’t noticed before. The scale – oh the legs are too short! I ruined the face! Worst of all, I complained in front of my son.

But my son – he loved our project. The tiger was his idea, and he didn’t hate the visit to Michael’s to pick out the paint colors and marbles for the eyeballs. He liked painting it and told me several times he thought we were doing a good job on it. He never once changed his tune when he saw the other kids’ projects on Facebook. It didn’t even phase him to compare his project to theirs.

So why was I having such a problem with it? Maybe the other moms spent more time on it. Or, maybe they did it in two days instead of my three? Maybe they had more help. Or, maybe they didn’t. Maybe they ….  aren’t me. And these moms…I really like them. They weren’t bragging or doing it to compare to others. Why was I twisting it into an opportunity to feel bad about myself?

So, when I saw the grade “we” received…..all I could say to myself is, “Let it go.”  Let go of the guilt and the disappointment in myself. I did the best with what I had. Shame on me for introducing my son to ugly comparison, when we were already proud of what we’d done.

For what reason do you need to tell yourself “Let it go” today?

Maybe it’s wrapping presents in floral paper since you ran out of Christmas paper, telling your kids to wear their dirty jeans again since you didn’t do laundry, leaving the toddler’s crayon masterpiece on the wall, or  letting your spouse win an argument tonight for the sake of peace…..let it go.

So, pals, join me tonight: Let. It. (whatever “it” might be). GO.

alek-grade

I had been trying to “let it go” ever since my son turned it in and there was nothing more to be done. Now, I can for sure. ……….. Even the extra credit was earned. BOOOOOOOM!

 

 

 

Good ‘Nuff girl

blog-cinderella-cake

I used to be more of a perfectionist. I used to try to control everything. I used to want to know which roads the driver was taking and see if there was a more efficient way. I used to freak out if a cake I was frosting wasn’t perfect. I recall scrubbing my apartment bathroom toilet on my hands and knees with a toothbrush. (And I lived alone! No men, no toddlers!).

 

Then…life happened. Kids came along and I had different worries. Kids’ fingerprint marks showed up everywhere and I couldn’t keep up. Toys stayed in the middle of the floor all night (gasp!) and guess what: I slept fine.  Life got busier and I stopped caring about every little detail. I started taking more photos and I laid on the floor letting my son crawl all over me instead of wiping down the countertop again. When my husband and son were playing and my husband said, “B-you’ve gotta see this” I ran into the living room to witness it and didn’t care that I had one more dish to rinse.

 

Then, my husband died. I didn’t care about details. A weed-filled yard, cobwebs in the corners, flipping the mattress…whatever. I’ll take care of it eventually. When I realized God is in control and I’m not…I became a “Good ‘nuff girl.” God is perfect. I am not. I don’t have to cross every “t” and dot every “i.” I do my best with what I have, and I enjoy life. If I don’t do something perfectly, I call it “good ‘nuff.”

 

That being said, I don’t want anyone to think this applies in absolutely every area of life. I do thoroughly shower, take excellent care of my kids, and try my best to cook meat to the proper temperature. For safety’s sake, “good ‘nuff” doesn’t always cut it. Be assured I’m not skimping in these areas. Professionally, I am detailed and follow the rules, so I’m no slacker there, either.

 

My point is, are there things in your life that YOU should become “good ‘nuff’ at?  Should you stop trying to be a perfect housekeeper? Are you trying to win a competition with that birthday cake?  (And I do have friends that are passionate about these things and if you love it, keep doing it. But if you love to hate it – stop it.)

Do you have to bring the most creative snack even though it stresses you out and takes way more time that you thought it would? Would you feel guilty having a “cereal and toast night” for dinner? Why? What can you change this week that will make life easier for you? What small details can you let go of…in order to more fully pay attention to your family and God?

 

Take it from the girl who once brought Little Caesar’s Crazy Bread to a potluck (major hit, by the way).  

 

Let someone else drive (Hmmm…God?) and take the long way or different way home. So the Cinderella cake isn’t perfect….well, it’s kinda funny and it’ll taste just as good.

Let all that you do be done in love (1Corinthians 16:14).  Do your best, but for God -not out of desire for perfection, not to compare yourself with others, not to exhuast your stress level or get in the way of time with your family and God.

You are Good ‘Nuff for Him.

***** Addition:  If anyone is interested in this topic of giving up control, my friend Shannon Popkin’s book, Control Girl, will be coming out in January! I am very excited for this book. Click below for more info!